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> Real World Engagements With Real Life People Living Ordinary Lives, How can I wait to get married?
springchicken19
post Oct 28 2008, 10:45 PM
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My boyfriend and I KNOW we are supposed to be together. He is 25 and a high school teacher with both a job and a house, and I am a 19-year old sophmore nursing student living in an apartment on campus. We have been dating for a year and a half. We are both Christians and are waiting until we get married to have sex and refuse to move in together becasue it would be way to much temptation.

When we were six months into our relationship, he expressed his desire to marry me. I threw myself into thoughts of marriage by the next year and half. However, each time we spoke more in depth about getting married, he would bump the date forward that he wanted to do it, until I realized that my hopes of getting married half way through my sophmore year were not the same as his desire to wait until after my Junior year. I had originally decided I wanted a small wedding, as I have never been a good planner and I would rather just be able to be with him. But he is saying that we are going to wait a year and eight months from now (my junior summer) That will be after my Junior year in nursing school. I have been told that it is the hardest year. A senior nursing student told me just to pack my bags and move into our school library for the year cause I would practically live there anyways. I think it would be best to get married BEFORE my Junior year. As much as I would like to be able to be able to focus soley on being a wife during our first year of marriage, I don't know how I will be able to in the real world. So I think it will be ok to be scheduling our first year of marriage around my schooling and his job as a teacher. Neither of us want to wait until my senior year, but I fear that it is the only time we can since he doesn't think we can get married any earlier than junior year and I don't feel that we can get married immediately following it.

Question #1: If I am going to be so busy my Junior year, is that a good time to be engaged and trying to plan a wedding? Don't I need to be able to focus on him and I?
Question #2: Am I right to think that it will be ok for us to struggle for the first couple years of our marriage and then turn more towards us once I graduate?
Question #3: How are we supposed to wait so long to get married? And PLEASE skip the advice about "time flies... it'll be here before you know it!" GImme a break... this is the real world... we are trying to wait to have sex... it is... killing. but I wont post anything unwarranted.

PLEASE help me...

thank you for your time,
--Young and Innocent... or maybe just Clueless.
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WithAllMyHeart
post Nov 13 2008, 08:23 PM
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Hi Spring:]

I read your post, and yes this is THE REAL WORLD --
I can't give you any practical advice, I didn't have any
sense at your age, I did not wait and I married the wrong
person... But I'm thankful The Lord didn't leave me in
such a state !!

But I do want to encourage you, enjoy what
you have with your boy-friend now. When you look back
the time will have flown by -- focusing on what you don't
have and desire, but isn't in the cards at present,
is never a fruitful use of time or energy--

enjoy the friend
the companion-ship that you have now..

Be Still and know that He Is God,
while I don't have advice on what would work out best,
I do encourage you to submit all of it TO HIM
& let His spirit guide you in working out all the details --

prayerfully dani



--------------------
...Wherever He Leads Me
... I Shall Follow...
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clarence11
post Mar 1 2012, 05:18 AM
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Hi there,
I suggest you have done your marriage with your life partner and it is suitable time for your and your partner.
If you and your lovers settled then didn't comes any problems in your married life.

Regarded Best wises.


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Frostbite
post Mar 1 2012, 03:18 PM
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QUOTE (clarence11 @ Mar 1 2012, 05:18 AM) *
Hi there,
I suggest you have done your marriage with your life partner and it is suitable time for your and your partner.
If you and your lovers settled then didn't comes any problems in your married life.

Regarded Best wises.


_____________________________


Hi. Are you are liberal pagan? Or, are you a Christian who just sounds like a pagan? "Life partner"? "lovers"?

"Life partner" is a common euphemism for two people in a long-term non-marital relationship. "Lovers" is a common term for non-married people in a sexual relationship. As such, such terms are inappropriate for Christians to use in approving tones. And, I doubt you have any intent to rehabilitate the terms.

If they are planning to be married, the boyfriend is a fiance.

Springchicken19 should do whatever she and her fiance can agree to. I think they should marry sooner than later. But, if he wants to wait, that's his decision.
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