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> Sex/porn Addiction, Sexual Problems
Paul951
post Jun 20 2008, 02:40 AM
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I have been a so called Christian for 18 years, I have been strugling with pornography all my adult and teen life, I have had enough of it, but cannot seem to get of the "wagon" so to speak. After reading some of the things on this I, it only confirms my fears that it may destroy my family and my business and therefore my income!
I have a very strong Christain wife who is very revered in our Church, I get along when I can, I feel like a second class citizen compared with her walk though, I know I shouldn't but it is very hard when she is so prominent in our Church.

I need help, practical advice and prayer to get me through this (and someone I can answer to when things go wrong - accountability)

Please help me

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semi
post Jun 20 2008, 12:42 PM
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Paul -

Actually, the problem is about as simply solved as just ceasing to seek out porn. You better believe the temptation will still be there - and that’s the real problem - same as with over-eating, alcoholism, etc.

If every time the temptation arises you say, “No” - you will eventually get control over it - just like any other addiction.

It is not easy. I truly believe it is in this way that evil spirits which abound us all feed thoughts into our minds - urging us to do things we are weakest in at a time when we are weakest.

It is much easier to give in to temptation than to resist it. That is the nature of being human. In the Bible it is called “carnality” and “the flesh”.

The man most able to help you here is unable to do so for medical reasons, and that is Glen - who set up this site and wrote most of the Articles on here. He is an extremely capable Christian counselor and I have quoted him below:

--------------------

Read the John 5:1-9. Ask God 5 questions about these verses.

1. Why does it make sense Jesus would ask if the man wanted to be healed?
2. What would have to change in his life if he were healed after 38 years?
3. Why do you feel he dodged the question Jesus asked?
4. What was required of the man if he was to be healed?
5. How does this relate to my life and addiction?

“Love & Hugs”

---------------------

Shalom.
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ilovegod001
post Jun 24 2008, 02:39 PM
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Hi Paul,

I've just joined this site but I know where you are coming from as I've experinced a similar addcition since I was about 13 years old, im now 31 and have been fighting sex addiction for about 6 years. It was very tough to stop but I did it eventually and I've been totally ceilbate for a year a and a half now although it can still be tough it gets easier day by day. Clearly you are married and I'm single so there is a difference there but I can assure you that you can become free of the addiction whilst in a relationship, I've been on many sites and forums and a lot of people have done it, its a case of reconditioning yourself and accepting god's help to get through things. My addcition was so bad I felt psychotic when giving it up, but day by day I got better and every wave of temptation got easier as time went by. With pornrography addiction, which I did touch on for a time, you will sit in front of the pc for hours in a kind of trance, a slave to the addcition and the concoction of chemicals in your brain. Stop being a slave to those chemicals and let god help you defeat them. Whenever I feel particularly tempted I pick up a bible and read it till the feeling goes away. I'm not too great at the support thing as I find it hard to support myself somtimes but I just wanted you to know there is a way out, stop watching porn forever, I found at frst avoiding magazines, films and tv with good looking woman on them to be helpful for the first few months too.

Running helped me too, burns off excess adrenaline and helps you too sleep. If you need someone to answer to then god is the best guy (or girl) for the job, just think of god and when a laspse happens, its ok to slip once or twice just make sure it never happens again, god will support you on the long haul. If not god then answer to yourself, we are always our own worst critic, do it for your wife but most importantly do it for yourself. Stop being s a slave to addcition and become the person god wants you to be - free happy and joyful.

Good luck my friend and my prayers are with you
Ollie
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desinner
post Jul 16 2008, 11:34 PM
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Yo Paul,

you are not alone. I am not sure if I can help you but this is from my own experience.

i used to surf a lot of porn. For me I'd go to work, I'd have a ready smile and seemingly ok on the outside but generally, I'd be depressed, moody or worried or just generally gloomy about life, and the directions I was going. I was either angry with things or people, confused about my future direction, depressed about life, or bored with life. When i was younger, porn was thrilling. But when i grew up, it became an escape from my ...life, if you could call it that. Yeah, to me porn was an escape from the negative feelings of life. Everytime I surfed/watched porn, it seems I was distracted from my troubles and the niggling worries of life. But the trouble with this kind of escape is that over time, you need more and more of it to reach the same level. And after awhile, even when you're not doing it, you'd be thinking about it. I guess you could say I was addicted to it. I mean, I wanted it bad enough to forgo outings, work stuff or doing other things just so I'd get an opportunity to watch porn.

For me i guess it came to a point when my professional life and personal life was starting to fall apart. And I thought that even tho my depressed self said that my life was crap, I could see that it was going to get a lot worse if I continued down the line. Bad enough that I 'm already a slave to my damn boss and here i go being a "slave" to some feeling I couldn't control.

I just got tired of who I am and wanted to change things so I have stopped the watching the stuff. I have joined a Martial Arts class, twice a week. I work out too at home; if I was going to be addicted, I might as well be addicted to working out, hah! Basically trying basic things that will work my body and then my mind, step by step. Of course, most important is I wake up in the morning and ask God to help me keep my hands clean and my heart pure. Even today at work, thoughts of porn came thru my head - but i know it didn't come from me, those damn porn arrows from Satan fired at me, but I remembered my prayer, and I put on my armor, no problem. When I go back I gonna work out again. I'm not expecting a life filled without temptation, I know it's always going to be there. I'm just looking for a simple way to say no. I'm going to fill the time I used for porn with something else, and I can already feel the diff. try it, man. for me it was getting my body, my hands , my feet moving. Also please check out the websites for anti-porn or anti-addiction stuff. A simple technique may make your struggle a lot easier to work with. I've failed many times before, when i've thrown out my porn only to collect more later. So don't let any subsequent fall throw u back but don't give in willingly either. You're in a war, my friend, an internal struggle within yourself . If you fail, you probably know the consequences, maybe you even feeling it now. But if you succeed, to the victor the spoils will go! I don't know for how long but i'm trying, and I'm having a good time at it. Could have been a lot worse. Just do it, my friend. And know that in your struggles, someone here struggles with you.

Make a 10-20-30 day count of your new start, and reward yourself accordingly (healthy rewards). And don't forget those who stand by you - your wife, family, Jesus.

"Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." 2 Timothy 2:22 NIV

When dealing with pornography and sexual sins, don't stick around in situations where you'll be tempted to compromise. Too often people linger in the temptation zone, only to weaken and fall. Joseph set a great example for us when he ran out of the house when Potiphar's wife was putting the moves on him:

p/s- and drop the second class citizen thinking, will ya, dude?. Jesus won't look at you and say that, so why should you do it to yourself. Each own of us have our own "space for improvement", and that's it. Do what you have to do. Good luck, pal!
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jayzeey
post Aug 21 2008, 06:49 PM
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Hey Paul,

I really feel for you on what you're going through. But I'll keep this brief. From my experience of being a addicted to a drug and overcoming (still overcoming process), depression, adhd, etc. is that you need a group to belong to that can help walk you the process of overcoming this disease. Yes, you have a disease which can be cured bro, but the right antidote. That antidote is Jesus Christ and the Christ centered 12 step process.

Go to www.celeberaterecovery.com to find a church near you. In my opinion, you can keep trying to beat this thing on your own which may work short term, but not long. Or, you can surrender to other Christian brothers and sisters, admit your powerless and that only God and you together can fix the problem. I hope you'll be committed to checking it out.

Good luck
Jacob
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skreiman
post Mar 31 2012, 08:22 PM
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Hi Paul,
I had been addicted to web porn too. Now I am trying one good meditation technique to overcome.
I've quit masturbating for one month. That is a good start.
In meditation, I put clothes on those porn actress who I saw on the internet and apologize to them.
It really work. I got this idea from this webpage: adf.ly/6tzre
FYR,
REI
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funtastic89
post Sep 14 2012, 05:51 AM
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Hi there,


Every addiction comes from an unloving spirit that has either entered through something that's happened in your life like feeling unloved by your parents, self issues, abuse etc and/or it can be a generational curse of perversion, uncleanness, lust, fantasy, unloving.


I had a pornography addiction for 6 years and after repenting of my sin and my forefathers sins which the bible tells us to do it left me and was completely free with not even the thought of looking remained. Before I would be constantly repenting for my sin but it was always pulling me back into it until God showed me that there's more involved then just repenting of the sin.


Feel free to message me
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