I am in an unhappy marriage. People tell me that I deserve to be happy. Even my Christian friends tell me that if the marriage is unhappy and at times abusive that God will forgive me if it ends.
I just need to know. From a Biblical standpoint. Does God want us to stay in an unhappy situation? Does He want me to just survive and endure this unhappyness till one of us dies or He returns. Is this what He wanted for me? Is this a my test, my cross to bear. I know He knows my heart. I know that He knows that I am just living one day at a time and being there for my kids.
However, I am losing patients. I am burning out. I am married and very lonely. I am not even close to enjoying what God wants for a Christian life or marriage. I pray for guidance continually.
Any advice?
Kanuk
Full Version: Happy Or Married?
Dear Kanuk,
I feel your pain I have been there, oh how horrible it feels. I can't tell you what God wants from you but I know he doesn not like divorce, he allowed it because of the hardness of our hearts, we were not able to forgive. The biblical terms for divorce, are if your husband has committed adultery or vice versa, and you cannot forgive, or he/you cannot change, then its grounds for divorce. I am not saying God like divorce even then, but its biblical grounds. Also if you or husband, either one, were a nonbeliver and the other believes, the non beliver can break it off and its biblical grounds for divorce, but the believer can not. I know that God forgives and I am not saying if you divorced he would not forgive, but Im also not saying I think you should or it's right. It's funny you ask about being happy and marriage, because my pastor at HDC had just talked about marriage, and he asked, what if God didn't intend for us to marry to be happy but to marry to be holy? He said the more messed up we are in our relationships the closer to God we seem to get. Our marriage is an example of how God loves us, How we in a way are married to Christ. He gave us marriage to show us this , and he would never give up on us like he would not want us to give up on each other. I know it is hard, oh I do not wish to re-live any of those pains, but they do pass, it does get better
Just pray for God's will in your life, pray that he will show you what you are suppose to do. I always recommend this movie called "Fire Proof" it's an awesome movie on christian marriage, and they have notebooks to go with it where you follow this plan, I would def. recommend that.
Matt. 19:6 "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together , let no man seperate"
Matt. 19:8" He said to them, Moses , because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beggining it was not so."
I feel your pain I have been there, oh how horrible it feels. I can't tell you what God wants from you but I know he doesn not like divorce, he allowed it because of the hardness of our hearts, we were not able to forgive. The biblical terms for divorce, are if your husband has committed adultery or vice versa, and you cannot forgive, or he/you cannot change, then its grounds for divorce. I am not saying God like divorce even then, but its biblical grounds. Also if you or husband, either one, were a nonbeliver and the other believes, the non beliver can break it off and its biblical grounds for divorce, but the believer can not. I know that God forgives and I am not saying if you divorced he would not forgive, but Im also not saying I think you should or it's right. It's funny you ask about being happy and marriage, because my pastor at HDC had just talked about marriage, and he asked, what if God didn't intend for us to marry to be happy but to marry to be holy? He said the more messed up we are in our relationships the closer to God we seem to get. Our marriage is an example of how God loves us, How we in a way are married to Christ. He gave us marriage to show us this , and he would never give up on us like he would not want us to give up on each other. I know it is hard, oh I do not wish to re-live any of those pains, but they do pass, it does get better
Just pray for God's will in your life, pray that he will show you what you are suppose to do. I always recommend this movie called "Fire Proof" it's an awesome movie on christian marriage, and they have notebooks to go with it where you follow this plan, I would def. recommend that. Matt. 19:6 "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together , let no man seperate"
Matt. 19:8" He said to them, Moses , because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beggining it was not so."
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