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Lostmyway
I have known my wife for fifteen years, and love her to death. I have never even thought of striking her, but recently I did just that. I'm not much of a drinker, probably why I was so drunk, but on this night I drank a lot. I was having rough sex with my wife and I struck her really hard across the face. This wasn't some planned domination kinky sex, but it was hot and heavy. She was smocked but we continued, almost as if it turned her on more. Well at a certain point it was no longer funny to her but I kept slapping her, like I was some possesed person. I don't know what got into me, I never punched her or kicked her but she now feels betrayed somehow. I don't blame her, I was really drunk too but this sort of thing had never happened in fifteen years. I didn't slap her out of some argumentative rage, it started as mutual but somewhere it stopped. I feel terrible, and my wife has lost trust in me. I feel like I've somehow lost my way in life and the devil has taken advantage. I need Gods help! Can someone please help me? I want to help heal my wires trust wounds and I want to be sure this doesn't happen again. I already apologized profusely and said I would never drink again, I don't drink much to begin with.
6609
LostMyWay,
I give you credit that you understand your wifes feelings about this, and has apologized for it. I know sorry doesn't change it, but worry changes less. It will take time and work to earn her trust back, while working on that, keep working on your faith in God. I believe that it was a weak point in your life and the Devil took the opportunity. I will pray for you and your marriage as well as for your wife. I will Pray that the Lord will take the Devil out of your life and out of your marriage and that it will make you and the marriage stronger than ever before. Keep looking up, God does answer prayers.
6609.
FlouriteStar
LostMyWay,

I think you have made a great first effort toward resolving this problem. I thank God that He has given you the courage to admit that you were wrong and the strength to apologize to your wife for it.

You have a long road ahead of you, however. Trust is funny: it takes a moment to break and sometimes a lifetime to repair. You and your wife should take this opportunity to do a kind of spiritual and moral evaluation of yourselves and each other (your wife is not completely faultless in this incident...) You also need to try to dive into the incident itself. When did the sex go from passionate, intense, and "rough" as you put it to overtly physically violent? What changed? Why were you both drawn into this kind of activity? (I don't mean for you to answer these questions here! They are just something to think about.) There may be underlying emotional baggage that needs to be explored before you can both move past this.

Do you have a spiritual leader that you can go to for counseling? Or is there a relationship counselor in your area that can help you with this?

I pray that God leads you in this. I pray that He heals both of your hearts and that He allows you to find a stronger love than either of you thought possible.
God bless
FS
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