so i need advice from anyone. 7 months ago my girl and i broke up for several reasons. lack of communication, indecisiveness, our careers, are the largest reasons. anyway so since then i've been wanting and praying for us to return to our former relations. its been tough time but were back to being best friends as we once were. i honestly feel that its God's will for us to be together, maybe not now, but sometime. as previously stated, ive been praying and hoping about this relentlessly. there have also been events that lead me to belive that things are working out. i do realize i should "walk by faith, not by sight" but still these events are reassuring. unfortuneatly, every so often, something throws off my balance and i fall down a spiral of worry. usually they are things like small aurguments or some of the other friends she has. thers no evidence to support it, but i worry about losing her to one of her male friends. and following that i find something in the scripures, that reestablished my faith and trust in God that he will provide.
here's my issue; i cant seem to continuously turst God. and i worry about this issue alot. that things wont work out. of losing her totally. i am discouraged and i feel that im running out of energy in pursuing this goal. oddly, sometimes i feel like im running out of time, like i have to acheive this before its too late. at times i feel like giving because how hard it gets.
i have been told that sometimes God says no, but i cannot find anything written about ever happening or a refernce that denial may happen, in the bible. Jesus say " ask and it shall be given to you" matt. 7:7 and agian "for everyone that asks, recieves" matt 7:8. well im constantly told "maybe it's not Gods will" but i cant find anything to support it and i think God is great enough to find ways for things to match up. also people tell me that ungodly things may influence our desires and we'll think that its a calling from God. but it isnt. my only rebutal to that is that this issue has undoubtedly brought me closer to Him, i understand more now, and even though i waver i still feel that i have learned alot about trusting Him. so i dont see how something not of God as brought me so much closer to him.
anyway i would appriciate any input, enlightenment, or advice. also, you can be as blunt and straightforward as u like, its ok!
p.s. not to be rude, but i dont do well with the saying "there's more fish in the sea" or anything along those lines. i feel that i should, and have the right to "catch the fish" that i want, and not just settle for whatever "bites the hook"