My little brother has just separated from his wife, and two children. He's done nothing but fight, and drink since. Last night I met him at the emergency room, third injury this week. First was the broken wrist (fight), Second was the broken nose (fight), now the broken ankle, still not sure what happened. When I arrived he was so drunk he was slobbering on himself. I stood there staring at a stranger. My immediate reaction was to get angry. His father begged him to come home with him, but he wanted to return to his friends home, where the latest injury happened. I don't understand. I feel so helpless, I love my brother, but at the same time, I have a husband and two children, and I will not allow his new found wreckless behavior effect the family I work so hard for. Is this selfish? My brother wants to come to see his neice and nephew, but my husband says that after seeing the condition my brother is in, he's no longer welcome in our home, unless he is ready to start helping himself. I am scared, I don't want my brother to think that we are shutting him out. HELP! I'm scared that I am losing my brother. How can you help someone who believes there's no good himself? Jen

Hi Jen! We're praying for your little brother. I want to let you know that shutting your brother out while he's living like this is the best thing for him, not just the best thing for your family. As hard as it is to accept, it seems his wife has seen some character traits she didn't want around her and her children, too. I'd recommend you call him or visit him and let him know you love him, want to spend time with him and want him to be able to be an uncle to your children, but you cannot let that happen until he is sober, living in recovery and providing an uplifting example for your children. Tell him it doesn't matter what he has done but if he continues to do it, he can't be part of your life. That way, being part of your life can add to his motivation to quit drinking and grow up. We'll be praying for all of you.