Hey i found this site its amazing im so thankful that god let me find it.

i find going to church a huge struggle well leaving the house speaking to anyone doing anything a huge struggle but not going to church is the most painful. but there is a church service on here yayayay!!!!

i have some mental health issues. i no i do, im supposed to be going to see a psychotherapist so i can you know get "diagnosied" but im to scared. im so confused and lost i havent gone to church in weeks, im not one for leaving my house, not anymore im too emotionally messed up. plus i sleep most of the day. that way i can avoid contact with people, and can be alone with just me and the darkness except it could be me and god but how do i ask him in when im so screwed up. i undestand now that i am going to be officially diagnosied with these personality disorders i realise im not the evil person i or everyone else thinks i am, but what does it mean. i have done some bad things really bad things which i no now is because of my disorder but i sinned so much and i dont know how to go back to god, yet again with the same burdens and say i still havent given them up like you asked me to im still carrying them arround like a knife in my back. just like you told me not to but i still need your help. how can i really get myself to give it up except all the bad things ive done and move on with my life and not hold on to them, to accept that i am forgiven how do i do that its all very well being told thats what i have to do but how what do i do with all the guilt all the worry and anxity where do i put it and how do i put it there when i cant even deal with the fact that i waste the whole day in bed because i am so pathetic that i cant face reaity. how are you supposed to go to a god when humans dont accept you and you dont accept you how is god that seems so very very far away going to help me.

im so lost and hurt so much from my own self judgment and mistakes let alone the rest of it.

i need prayer to help me get my issues undercontrol and to try and live a life again

how do i live my life as a christian when i have disorders that make me the worst example

sorry for the confused ramble

Dear Beloved, what you are passing through is definitely a huge attack from the enemy created to destroy and paralyse your life but I know that our God who is above satan, all evil powers and principalities can and will set you free from this affliction. You just have to believe and be ready to seek his help. Do not be deceived that he is not willing to save you no matter how many times you have cried to him for help and gone back to sinning for we have all done that but yet he still forgives us because his love for us is greater than the sin we commit.

I highly admonish you to go back to church asap and get biblical/spiritual counseling from your pastor/spiritual leader for through the power of the Holyspirit they will know how to deal with your situation.

Be encouraged beloved, Jesus loves you very much and he wants you to be set free so that you can live the life he has ordained for you to live.

shalom,