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Hello everyone,
I haven't been to the forum lately, and here I am facing another struggle. I look forward to the day when I can give advice to others in need, instead of always asking for advice. This forum has been a real blessing. I have received godly advice and care from my brothers and sisters in Christ. I would like to hear your opinion and feelings on my current situation. I hope I am not sounding redundant!
When I informed my fiance that I was no longer going to be sexual with him until we went forth with our marriage plans, he seemed to realize how serious I was. That was encouraging. So we began premarital counseling with our Pastor. We have only met once so far, but it went well.
A few months back his x-girlfriend from high school- over ten years ago-got in contact with him. They emailed back and forth and Dave reassured me that she was just a friend and that he was also best friends with her husband in high school. Even though I knew she was married I still felt uneasy about it. Their conversations seemed innocent enough and we even met her and her husband for a drink at a local tavern, (I had red bull!!). His ex was insulting her husband all night and giving Dave "the eye". (She even played "Don't cha" on the jukebox twice in a row.) She was attractive but I am confident in myself and did not feel threatened. We even talked about making plans to have them over for dinner and to meet our 1 & 2 yr old. To get to the point- I went to visit my best friend last friday, since I seldom do anything and Dave does alot- he was quite agreeable to it. While I was gone he and his ex emailed each other. She asked if he remembered when they were a couple, her sitting on his lap, making promises to each other to be together, and how she has been fond of him even after they broke-up, etc.-. I was deeply hurt by his reply. He told her he often wonders "what if", that he did not email her lately because I had a problem with it and we have a problem every week, and he could see why I was jealous because she looked so good, it was always fun-(in big,bold letters) etc.
He knows that I know but he is avoiding it trying to "make nice" with me. I can't even look at him. I am sick with hurt and tired of being betrayed by him. We were, well at least I thought we were, going in the right direction and doing better, until all of this. Should I continue the premarital counseling or just give up?Am I fighting a losing battle? I feel so upset that I feel physically sick. I need to be there for my children but I am really starting to feel depressed and trapped on top of it all. Please, I need some advice. Thank you, kindly.
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Back Again, fiance's hurtful email
Jan 10 2007, 12:04 PM
