Mother In Law Options

[motto65]

My mother in law lives next door and is in her 80's but in quite good condition mentally and physically for her age. My only big problem is that she spoils our kids. Whenever we tell them they need to make their own food or not watch tv or something--they will go over to her house and she will make them whatever they want to eat and watch tv, get on the computer, etc. I am the mom and they regularly run over what I tell them they need to do like learn to make their own food,etc instead of going to grandma for help. (My kids are 10,15 and 16 yrs old--not babies either). This drives me crazy. She just told me a few min ago how she made my son some breakfast and it was "ok" after I asked him what he wanted to have at home earlier and had to leave to take one of the other kids to an outing. I think she enjoys this too. The rest of the family around here is on my husband's side and they don't get it either...they just think this keep her young...I am a Christian but I am about fed up with this. My kids need to learn more responsibility. My husband lived with his parents pretty much until he married me when he was 30yrs old. So he does not get it either. I was forced out on my own by the age of 19 and have never been back. My parents expected us to make it on our own...anyone with good advice? Thanks...

[Michael]

Your in a rather tough situation to say the least and I'll pray for you as well as your mother in law. I can tell you that my wife is somewhat the same as your mother in law in regards to her grandchildren. They live next door also. I've tried my best to help her to understand that she is not helping the children to grow emotionally by letting them get by with some of the behaviors that she allows and sometimes defends if the children's mother or I try to correct them. It is not an easy task to raise children. All I can say is to do what you need to with love in your heart and seek guidance through prayer.